SMILEYS!!!!!!

So basically one school day in 2021 I was drawing emojicons as stickmen in MS Paint, and when I got to :] something kinda just happened

This bastard proceeded to consume my thoughts for the next 6 months. I mean just look at him.

I've always had trouble expressing emotion, at least in the way/extent that other people apparently expected of me... so my entire life I've had to deal with people asking if I was upset or depressed, sometimes repeatedley insisting I look like I am even after I said I wasn't. Thus, smileys resonate with me in a kinda sarcastic way, as if saying, "OF COURSE I'M HAPPY!!! I'M HAVING THE GODAMN TIME OF MY LIFE!!!!!"
...I mean I get they have purportedly good intentions, but it wasn't like I was crying or anything, so it just comes off as annoying and vaguely dystopian...
Thanks to that, smileys that are uncanilly exagerated and/or paired with violence are cathartic to me... it's how I feel about their superficial expectations
...After all, what not there is to be hysterical abuot 24/7??? remeber be positev and smile always... or else

anyyways i hope this page can bring a happyness to you (be it ironic or not) and maybe some new knowyledge (however useless and obscure it may be)

Free Smileys

I'm sure most of you have seen these old German smileys around which are so unapologetically horrifying it's great. My first memory of them is my brother tormenting me with these during remote learning, but now I love them... and apparently there are lots of people that are just as passionate about them as me, if not more...

beautifully said by Name Not Displayed

Here's a fan-made archive of them, though I coulda sworn I downloaded mine from somewhere else? Cause a bunch of my filenames were in Polish, but I can't find the drive where I got them

Smiley Archive

An analog horror series consisting of 12 VHS videos that tell the story of an unethical experiment
The story has some assembly required and I have some vague theories on wtf the last tapes are supposed to mean, but I'm not confident enough to share

The original uploads were deleted, but you can watch them all here or here... though uhhhhhh I discovered/first watched them on a shock site o_o
...Idk why it was on there, since there's no gore (sadly)

...But I still can't say anything to do the series justice. it's just too perfect

Green Smilies

...is it me or is the site broken?
Well here are some that I downloaded beforehand, tho the wayback machine works too

This "Mr. Green" guy seems to be the site mascot of sorts

YouAreAnIdiot

Famous trojan from the 2000s that would spawn in tabs with this friendly message until your computer crashed :)
It can be stopped via task manager or hard shutdown, but apparently there was a version that would come back even after reboot
The temptation to run this thing goes crazy...

Bendy Man (I call him 'Bendy Buddy' tho)

I found this guy in a drugstore, he was the last of his kind
i love him so much

Smiley Stressball

On my quest to obtain the undermentioned smiley water wiggler I saw a smiley box with 2 clearance tags on it. At first I thought it contained one big smiley stress ball, then several smiley stress balls, then clear slime with smileys in it... turns out it's some kind of gelatinous eggsack with smileys eerily trapped inside
...i can't wait for them to start hatching so i can have an army of mini smileys

Smiley Water Wiggler

i seriouesly underestimated how fun these things are until i actually encounteered one in person and knew i neeeded to get one for myself and had my heart set on that one with smileys that i saw on the intrenet and now that i have it i'm plagued by the urge to buy more of these things i need at least one for eACH of my hands and tendrils

Smiley Sings

tf you mean i can't embed the video screw youtube do they seriously care if someone watches a low-quality video from 2006 on an obscure deepweb site just cause it's got a copyrighted song oh cry about it

...do Jellenheimers count

alright the Fluffy Community would warrant a seperate page of explanation by itself but basically there are these weird round smiley things called Jellenheimers and they umm they'are uh yeah that's pretty much it

Stamps, Blinkies, etc.

...yeah i compressed all of these so if you want em with better quality you can probably find them on other sites sooner or later for the ones i didn't add links to